Remembering Icey

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tomsk
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Re: Remembering Icey

Post by tomsk » 29 Sep 2017, 17:34

In mine too doh!¬

tomsk
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Re: Remembering Icey

Post by tomsk » 29 Sep 2017, 17:37

http://www.dailymotion.com/.../x227rl_m ... fety-dance

Hear we go...

http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x227rl ... ance_music




not a flaming again,
:cry: :lol:
at last! yes ,Icey ;iked the video and song 'The safety dance' by' Men without hats'
:lol:

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yogi
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Re: Remembering Icey

Post by yogi » 30 Sep 2017, 07:44

Did I see a Punch and Judy show in that video?

ConorRoyston
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Re: Remembering Icey

Post by ConorRoyston » 30 Sep 2017, 11:30

So this is the speech I said after my brothers.

Sorry it's so long. Weirdly time passed quickly when I was saying it.


Hello, my name is Conor. It is with great sadness that I stand in front of you today delivering this eulogy for my mother, Maria Scott.
I hope together we may acknowledge and share both our joy in the gift that her life was to us, and the pain that her passing brings. In sharing the joy and the pain together today, may we lessen the pain amongst us and remember more clearly the joy.

As someone who isn't usually good at giving speeches, I kind've shot myself in the foot when I openly volunteered to do this tribute section.
I hope this speech is good enough to remember her by.
I wish I could add everything about her life into this however for someone who has lived such a full life, I'm going to talk mostly about how it was growing up and having her as my mum.
It's been difficult to think about what to exactly say but also very rewarding. It has allowed me to reflect on the times my mother and I spent together and how wonderful a person she was to me and others.
I am glad that I am able to share some of these memories with you today and some of the attributes that made my mother so special to us.
Please forgive me if I make any mistakes over the next few minutes.

Now I'd like to start this off by saying a few facts about her.
As a lot of you will know, mum was born and grew up in Burton Joyce in 1952
She was one of four children, two brothers and a sister.
The main thing I can remember about my mum was she was very into her writing and story telling.
If I recall correctly, I remember her telling me when I was younger, that between the ages of 8 and 10 she had written a few poems that were sent off by her teachers and published in the national paper!
She then went on to write a few plays, one of which ended up getting noticed by a local play director and was eventually performed not long after at her primary school.
At 11 she proceeded to get into Carlton Le Willows school. Back then it was classed as a grammar school and was vastly harder to get into. Out of everyone in her school year she was the only person to get in.

When growing up, my mum used to read to me and my brother, a few chapters of a book most nights.
Her favourite, I would say, was the Harry Potter series.
The way she told them would bring books to life.
If a character spoke, she made a voice for that particular person.
If they whispered or spoke loudly, she would raise her voice accordingly.
If it was a paragraph describing an area, the way she spoke the words made it feel like drawing the outline of the scene on a canvas while your imagination painted each area in.
It was through her way of reading to us that got me into reading myself.

Now as much as I loved reading, I could not stand actual English lessons or writing at school - so you can imagine she wasn't thrilled when I turned around when I had to pick my GCSE options and asked if I could drop English...

This was one of the things that set me and my mum apart. Where she loved writing, I was very into maths and computers. The polar opposite of what she liked.
However, that never stopped my mum asked me about my maths homework.
She would ask if there was anything she could do to help so I would present her with, perhaps, an equation.
She would take one look at it .... and then go back to writing one of her letters completely baffled.

To go deeper, as some of you know, my mum was not quite up to date with technology.
She saw this is a perfect opportunity to ask me countless times a week, simple questions about the computer.
Some of my favourite ones I remember are,

"If I disconnect the mouse.... will I lose my emails?"
"When I turn off the computer will we still have internet?"
and the most asked of all ------ "Conor...how do I copy and paste again?"

But she never gave up. She always saw this as an opportunity to learn and keep trying no matter how stressed or stubborn we got with each other.

Not only did she try to help me out with school, she cared for my brother.
As most of you know my brother has autism. But that didn't stop her from helping him to read and write, and although she couldn't help me with my maths work, she did with his.
She also taught him the basics of life and protected him as any loving mother would do.
When my brother fell ill years ago, this did not phase her and she always put him before herself at all times.

I learned a lot from my mother over the years. She taught me how important a strong work ethic is and how it is even more important to spend time with your friends and family.
Mum, it is evident how loved you were by how many people are here today.
I will never forget you.

I know I am not alone in my grief. Many family friends and loved ones have expressed their sympathies about my mothers long, difficult battle with cancer and the numerous complications she experienced as a result.
After she passed, I finally realized how grateful I am to have spent time with her during this final chapter of her exceptional life.

How many people in this world have it so much easier than my mum did.
How many never had half the trouble she faced, and yet lose sight so easily of what is truly important. Many of us get distracted by insignificant things in life, many of us brood and focus on our little problems, and forget that which is most important.

As I'm sure most of you know my mother loved to chat, and like me, we can sometimes get a bit carried away when we're in our moments however I know personally that no matter how embarrassed I got when she would "interrogate" certain friends of mine --- Sorry Mary.
She was only having a bit of fun and it was her way of getting to know people.

Just before I close out this speech, I'd just like to say a personal thank you to everyone that's in this room.
You being here alone shows how much of an impact my mother had to you in some-way.
As others have said to me in the recent weeks, my mum would try and make everyone she met feel welcome, and in some way everyone here returned that favour.
So from me personally, I thank you all.


This family, and her role as mother, was the most important thing to Mum. This is where she drew her strength and left her legacy. Being with her family was what Maria enjoyed most of all.
Her life had many obstacles, and she struggled for 8 years with a devastating illness. Yet through it all, her love and caring for her family remained her focus, and in so many, many ways, she was able to show that love to us. This perseverance through adversity is a powerful lesson for us, and I believe it is her legacy. What a wonderful lesson she gave us. Keep your priorities straight. Keep that which is most important in focus. Love and care for your family. Let them know in all the ways you can show them that you love them. Don’t let setbacks or any of the distractions of the world keep you from this most important aspect of life.

Mum, you have travelled the world.
You have lived in many different places.
You have made life long friends and you have made more than just a family.

Mum, when I saw you yesterday, it reminded me of the last few words you said to me.
I'll try my best to make it happen.
You'll never be forgotten.

I love you.

There was so much that didn't get put it but it was a speech not a book haha :)

I hope you all are okay.
I'm better now, the major part of it is over so now it's time to adapt back to life I guess. :)

tomsk
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Re: Remembering Icey

Post by tomsk » 30 Sep 2017, 16:38

That's beautiful Conor... :loveu: :loveu: :loveu:
and very apt especially loving to chat!

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pilvikki
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Re: Remembering Icey

Post by pilvikki » 30 Sep 2017, 17:55

well done, conor!

i rather doubts i would have managed that!

:loveu:

miss her...

and still staring at my computer rather blankly.

tomsk
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Re: Remembering Icey

Post by tomsk » 30 Sep 2017, 18:01

Icey always told me she was in her middish 30's!
:lol: :lol: :lol:

She would want us to be happy though..
and treasure special memories... :cool:

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yogi
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Re: Remembering Icey

Post by yogi » 01 Oct 2017, 08:55

I thought I knew Icey pretty well, but I learned two new things about her in that eulogy. One is that her name is not really Briar and, as tomsk pointed out, I was under the impression that Maria was approaching her 40th winter, not her 65th. She obviously was young at heart and easily can be forgiven for leading us astray. I personally tutored Icey in computer techniques and enjoyed the extra effort it took to get across some of the basics. But, more than her fear of all things digital, she and I also talked about the absolute panic that ensued when confronted with math problems. She was a saint to try and help her children in that regard.

tomsk
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Re: Remembering Icey

Post by tomsk » 01 Oct 2017, 15:44

:lol: She was often saying she be fick! which is of course nonsense..
She was brilliant at the English language composistion
If I get to heaven there's a few things I'll say to her...65 indeed!
:cry: :lol:

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pilvikki
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Re: Remembering Icey

Post by pilvikki » 01 Oct 2017, 16:45

i can't remember how old icy told me she was, more than that, but if someone on the net says she's mid thirties, that's how i take it. for that is the person i'm dealing with and it makes no difference to me. i'd just never get away with it myself, for my memory... erm, what was i saying...?

:rolleyes: :rolleyes: :lol:

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yogi
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Re: Remembering Icey

Post by yogi » 01 Oct 2017, 19:33

I've been told a few times that I don't act my age. I take that as a compliment. But, as has been said, the Internet is a virtual world and things like age do not matter. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

tomsk
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Re: Remembering Icey

Post by tomsk » 01 Oct 2017, 21:19

:lol:
we love you as you are Dennis...

:crazy: :cool:

ConorRoyston
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Re: Remembering Icey

Post by ConorRoyston » 04 Oct 2017, 13:36

My mum would've been 65 on the 29th of December.

It's been almost a week now, 6 days, since the funeral ( which I've caught a cold since and unfortunately been at work everyday )

Had a few people who didn't go to the funeral come round or apologise online.
Few have filled in a condolence in a book I bought the morning of said funeral.

Ashes arrived yesterday aswell. Feels weird knowing mum is "here"..

I think I've settled with the fact, atleast for the time that she's past.
Actually one thing that popped into my head, which hadn't for years was, when I was younger after school or when I had a job when younger I'd always run home and tell mum something about the day.

I had that same thought the other day when getting home. I came through the door and in my head said " oh mum I've got something to tell you " ... oh. :/.

But I'm okay! so is my brother and dad. Time to start clearing everything out.

Catch you all soon! :)

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pilvikki
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Re: Remembering Icey

Post by pilvikki » 04 Oct 2017, 15:37

well, you had a long time to prepare... not that it still will be easy. it's like i used to tell her about the kids and send her jokes and now it's like "bugger, need another victim...."

Image

tomsk
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Re: Remembering Icey

Post by tomsk » 04 Oct 2017, 16:11

clear off Vikki!

:tiptoe: :tiptoe: :tiptoe:
:mrgreen: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Hi Conor you are such a decent young fellow our thoughts are with you, your Brother and your Dad....
Your Mum liked the band' Nightwish' I told her they sound like a cough medicine....she could make me laugh so much and was always priceless company... :loveu: :loveu: :loveu:

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yogi
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Re: Remembering Icey

Post by yogi » 04 Oct 2017, 16:45

Thank you again for sharing your thoughts. The subject and your reaction prompts me to philosophize a bit about the situation. I have a few years up on you and had more idle time to think about life, the universe, and everything. In spite of what Deep Thought calculated, the answer to it all is not 42. :mrgreen:

Come next March my mum will have physically left us ten years ago. I was present when she parted and still have vivid images of her taking her final breath. It was bitter sweet. Her suffering had ended, yet she had left us. Or had she? Yes, her physical body functioned no more, but mum was more than that body. She had a heart, a mind, and a soul as well. I spent much time trying to understand exactly what is the mind and where it could be located. Does it cease to exist when the body decomposes? After all this time I still have no definitive answers, but I do know mum is with me and very much alive. I carry some of her genes, but more than that the memories accumulated over 63 years with her can never be expunged from my mind. Much of who I am is due to mum's nourishing me and teaching me how to be a good person. None of that can be taken from me by choice nor by circumstance. So, it seems, as long as I am alive, mum will be "here" as well.

The bond between mothers and her children is love. As long as you love your mum, the bond will remain. What is in the urn is not so significant as what is in your heart.

And, if I may add, do not hesitate to tell your mum whatever comes to mind at the end of your day. She wants to know that her time with you was well spent.

tomsk
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Re: Remembering Icey

Post by tomsk » 04 Oct 2017, 18:08

:clap: :loveu: :thumbu: :cheer: :banana: :bananacow: :happydance: :dance2:

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imhotep the 2nd
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Re: Remembering Icey

Post by imhotep the 2nd » 24 Feb 2018, 19:21

Oh I feel ever so guilty having not seen and read your eulogy Conor. Only now I have read it.
Wow, that really was a wonderful, beautiful and heartfelt meaningful message. I am ever so sorry I left it so late until now. But you know what they say...better late than never eh! My sincere thoughts and wishes are with you and your family.

Like I said in my first email to you, I was a dear online friend of your mum and she always sent me a special e-card on every special occasion, such as my birthday and Christmas without fail. I think we'd been online friends for many years. Oh yes, even when she had an account on Answerbank.co.uk.
I'm trying to figure out how long we've been friends. Hmm I would say at least several years, can't put a figure how long though. I will work it out one day. Lol.
Anyway, you really do seem a true gent at heart Connor. Your mum would be really really proud of you. :cool:

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imhotep the 2nd
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Re: Remembering Icey

Post by imhotep the 2nd » 24 Feb 2018, 19:28

To be honest, I reckon I would have welled up in tears reading that out aloud, being an emotional kind of person. :sad:

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imhotep the 2nd
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Re: Remembering Icey

Post by imhotep the 2nd » 24 Feb 2018, 19:31

yogi wrote:
22 Sep 2017, 08:22
She never failed to send us greetings for every occasion. Those Jacquie Lawson cards are epic
I couldn't agree more with you there Yogi :thumbu: :clap:

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