Getting old, fat and dowdy...
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Topics should be about experiences, comments, and observations from our members' personal lives.
Topics should be about experiences, comments, and observations from our members' personal lives.
Getting old, fat and dowdy...
Didn't want to do it...but again, under pressure from the hubby, I DID order a new winter coat last week. I've been putting it off, because Heaven knows, I have practically a dozen very nice coats anyway, none of which fit me anymore. I've been wearing one of Yury's old coats so far this year which *is* admittedly oversized and a bit on the shabby side, but I didn't want to "indulge" in ANYTHING new until I'd managed to lose at least 20 lbs. Have only lost five thus far :-( Yes, the weight loss is REALLY slow-going, and I have to remind myself continually that I DIDN'T put it all on overnight! Still, shopping for clothes is a depressing activity these days. I fear that I'll only look like one seriously huge cranberry once that coat is delivered tomorrow. But ordering a new coat, depressing as it was, was easier than listening to the hubby continually bitch at me as follows: "Cindy, you ARE an educated, professional woman, and you need to LOOK like it!" Yes, I know...some women would love to trade places with me, because so many have husbands bitching at them when they spend money buying new clothes, getting their hair done, indulging in manicures, pedicures, etc. MY husband will bitch at me when I DON'T do such things! Go figure...perhaps it's a good thing that I have somebody nagging at me. My appearance, these past few years, has been a continual source of depression for me lately (i.e., the increased weight, the not-so-young skin, etc.). Lately, I've been fighting the tendency to throw in the towel and just BE that dowdy, dumpy old woman that I've seen in the mirror lately. It appears that I have a husband who's NOT about to let me indulge in said tendency.
"The miracle is this: the more we share, the more we have." -- Leonard Nimoy (1931-2015)
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Icey
Re: Getting old, fat and dowdy...
Cindy, Cindy, I doubt you look half as bad as you think you do, and we all get older and see things in the mirror that we'd rather not - as I can testify to.
I don't agree with having to "look" like an educated professional woman. What's THAT, anyway? If you saw some of the consultants which I've had to see over time, you'd think they were run-of-the-mill patients, not people who're "Fellows" in their professions.
You work some long hours, and it can be easy not to see the weight creep on, or your skin looking as fresh as you'd like. The point is, you do your job, and very well by the sound of it.
I can understand when clothes suddenly don't fit any more. I've had the same problem, and it's horrible isn't it, but I'd rather be feeling well than look as though I'd stepped straight out of a beauty parlour and into my size 8-10 jeans which I wore as normal until about 3 years ago. I don't know what the corresponding US size is to that, but I was a skinny thing, and at just over 5ft. 7", some people thought I looked way too thin, but it was my natural self. None of our family're fat, so gaining weight made me feel awful, and I now know that it's not through stuffing myself with too much or the wrong type of food, but because my hormones got messed up. To other people, I now look "healthy". To me, I feel like the Hulk, but I've grown to like myself as I am, despite wishing that I could drop 2-3 sizes again. I don't think it's to be! : )
I'm reckoning that your coat'll look fab. Wear it and love it - you'll be fine.
I don't agree with having to "look" like an educated professional woman. What's THAT, anyway? If you saw some of the consultants which I've had to see over time, you'd think they were run-of-the-mill patients, not people who're "Fellows" in their professions.
You work some long hours, and it can be easy not to see the weight creep on, or your skin looking as fresh as you'd like. The point is, you do your job, and very well by the sound of it.
I can understand when clothes suddenly don't fit any more. I've had the same problem, and it's horrible isn't it, but I'd rather be feeling well than look as though I'd stepped straight out of a beauty parlour and into my size 8-10 jeans which I wore as normal until about 3 years ago. I don't know what the corresponding US size is to that, but I was a skinny thing, and at just over 5ft. 7", some people thought I looked way too thin, but it was my natural self. None of our family're fat, so gaining weight made me feel awful, and I now know that it's not through stuffing myself with too much or the wrong type of food, but because my hormones got messed up. To other people, I now look "healthy". To me, I feel like the Hulk, but I've grown to like myself as I am, despite wishing that I could drop 2-3 sizes again. I don't think it's to be! : )
I'm reckoning that your coat'll look fab. Wear it and love it - you'll be fine.
Re: Getting old, fat and dowdy...
I would like take this up as I have a serioius discussion i'd like to have with you two...
sorry about the mess, too shattered to fix them all..
maybe we could help each otherv out? I HAVE to loose the weight or i'llbe headed for the smallest wheels i'd had since 12...
tomorrow good?
Re: Getting old, fat and dowdy...
If I may interject a thought ... not being a lady, but having some amount of insight into old, fat, and dowdy. Those are normal things that happen to the vast majority of us human beings, be we males or females. Every person alive wants to look their best, and females seem to be more focused on that idea than us males, but it's a universal desire to look good. Life being what it is, certain unavoidable things happen to one's body. For example, the need for breast reconstruction after an attack from cancer left a scar that nearly wraps half way round my wife's body. Let's just say it's not pretty, but I love her because she is still here to be loved. It's been a couple years since we went through that trauma, and I have a much different perspective today on what is beautiful and what is not. Don't misunderstand. I admire a young and beautiful nymph as much as anyone, but it's not a requirement to be that way.
I'd only question Yuri's motives from an academic point of view. Is he attempting to create a woman he admired many years ago, or is he encouraging you to be your best self, whatever shape that might take? Then I'd suggest you pause a few seconds in that hectic lifestyle of yours and ask yourself how happy you are with what you see (something you apparently did already). Do whatever it takes to "feel" good about yourself. Once you accomplish that, then being your best for your mate will be natural. The rest of the world will just have to deal with what they see.
I'd only question Yuri's motives from an academic point of view. Is he attempting to create a woman he admired many years ago, or is he encouraging you to be your best self, whatever shape that might take? Then I'd suggest you pause a few seconds in that hectic lifestyle of yours and ask yourself how happy you are with what you see (something you apparently did already). Do whatever it takes to "feel" good about yourself. Once you accomplish that, then being your best for your mate will be natural. The rest of the world will just have to deal with what they see.
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Icey
Re: Getting old, fat and dowdy...
Yogi, that was a very thoughtful reply, coming from a male, and I don't mean that in any offensive way at all. You're right to love your wife and understand the trauma she's experienced, although not all men can.
Us women have "lots to look forward to" - very often childbirth, with all the associated sagging and ballooning which can occur, the menopause, which wrecks some folk and the fact that as we get older, most of us tend to gain a bit of weight, develop jowls and see wrinkles appearing by the day. We know that means that the first flushes of youth're over, but you're right, we can still do our best to look healthy and attractive, and if we're loved, it makes things a lot easier, so who gives a damn?
Us women have "lots to look forward to" - very often childbirth, with all the associated sagging and ballooning which can occur, the menopause, which wrecks some folk and the fact that as we get older, most of us tend to gain a bit of weight, develop jowls and see wrinkles appearing by the day. We know that means that the first flushes of youth're over, but you're right, we can still do our best to look healthy and attractive, and if we're loved, it makes things a lot easier, so who gives a damn?
Re: Getting old, fat and dowdy...
and it's the doc who has decreed I shall be slim and trim, like it not!
he's suggested a procedure to help my spinal cord get breathing room, as it's gotten quite strangled between my subluxated spine and a tarlov cyst. he doesn't want to consider an operation due to my age (sigh, there we go again), so they'll try something else first, which will merely require poking holes, instead of slicing me open. (i'll get my GP to explain it as I did not understand any of what he was saying) this procedure will also further clarify what's amiss back there.
in order for all that to work, i'll need to lose weight And get some stomach muscles. of course I get that. (but... where i'll find those muscles, I don't know, as they got wrecked 47 years ago and never fixed.... is a mystery and probably the cause of my wrecked back.)
so guys, how are we going to lose the weight, considering I can't do anything physical, like you know... exercise? which would be best way for me.
suggestions?
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Icey
Re: Getting old, fat and dowdy...
When a person has a back injury and can't do much physical exercise, there're still ones you can do, such as cardio vascular ones which even people in wheelchairs're encouraged to do. This might be using a rowing machine for example, but food intake has to be monitored as well. It's easy to eat the same sized portions as the rest of the family're having. The actual food doesn't matter quite so much, as it's the quantity that counts. Providing a person has a good balance of fruit, veg, pasta, potatoes and cereals, you can eat a whole range of stuff so long as you steer away from the fat-laden and sugary goodies that we all like to indulge in now and again.
When I slipped a disc and couldn't move for a while, my physio also gave me exercises to strengthen the back and stomach muscles. They were gentle, but a bit uncomfortable at first. You get used to them, but they have to be done every day. I can send you this exercise if you want.
With the weight, aim to lose just 1-2 lbs a week. It sounds slow, but you're more liable to keep it off than if you go on a crash diet or lose large chunks at once.
The first problem's in getting your head round to the idea. We all start off with good intentions and then gradually slip into old habits, but a slow loss is much better for keeping the weight off once you've reached your target, as it doesn't go back on again as quickly as when you say, lose 6-7 lbs in a week. That sort of weight loss can easily be put back on again with a couple of hefty meals that you might've been used to before.
I was also advised to eat small but often, and I think you do that already, but it's the size of each portion which counts.
Best of luck!
When I slipped a disc and couldn't move for a while, my physio also gave me exercises to strengthen the back and stomach muscles. They were gentle, but a bit uncomfortable at first. You get used to them, but they have to be done every day. I can send you this exercise if you want.
With the weight, aim to lose just 1-2 lbs a week. It sounds slow, but you're more liable to keep it off than if you go on a crash diet or lose large chunks at once.
The first problem's in getting your head round to the idea. We all start off with good intentions and then gradually slip into old habits, but a slow loss is much better for keeping the weight off once you've reached your target, as it doesn't go back on again as quickly as when you say, lose 6-7 lbs in a week. That sort of weight loss can easily be put back on again with a couple of hefty meals that you might've been used to before.
I was also advised to eat small but often, and I think you do that already, but it's the size of each portion which counts.
Best of luck!
Re: Getting old, fat and dowdy...
I understand, and sincerely sympathize with your exercise problems, pilvikki. I, too, have a wrecked back but, judging from your pic, mine is presumably *not* as wrecked as yours appears to be. And no, I will NOT have an MRI done of it, as our notoriously customer-hungry spinal surgeon is constantly urging me to do. If it IS that bad, I'm not certain that I want to know about it! Heaven forbid that I should EVER be tempted to have ANY kind of spinal surgery done! I've seen the complications, the repeated surgeries, etc., and I don't want to fall into that trap. These folks tend to end up dependent upon opioids and their "pain-management" physicians as they CONTINUE to lose mobility with repeated spinal fusions...NOT good! Anyway, if I want to add my back pain to the chronic pain from the lupus AND the freaking osteoarthritis and the bone spurs, I'm about as motivated to exercise as you are! Heaven knows, I spend a minimum of three nights per week on my feet, and tend to spend the REST of my week paying for it, in pain and exhaustion. Still, according to my OWN Doc, I've gotta suck it up and deal with it and GET THAT EXERCISE. He's right, actually. By dropping a good 50 pounds, I would certainly lessen the stress on my back and on my joints, and would, as a result, probably have far less pain than I do today. THAT is a goal worth working for. Unfortunately, since not only is my back destroyed but my knees are, too, I've gotta stick with the low-impact stuff. My oldest daughter may be a running fiend, but jogging, running, etc. is a no-go for me. I've recently purchased a membership at a local gym that's open 24/7 (all the better to fit in with my "vampire" schedule), and have determined that the elliptical machine is *nothing* for me compared to pounding the floor, bending, lifting, etc., that I do on the job. So far, I've managed to work myself up to 45 minutes at a stretch. Heaven knows, I'd LOVE to be able to fit in some time on the exercise bikes on top of that, but my right knee keeps giving me fits...the last time I even *tried* one of those things, I wasn't on it for 5 minutes before those silent tears started rolling! Grrrr!!! My Doc has given me an amphetamine-based med called phentermine to give me a "start" on the weight loss. While it DOES give me more energy (which is GREAT!) and certainly suppresses my appetite (also, GREAT!), it elevates my heart rate to where it feels like it's pounding in my ears and drives my blood pressure (which is also a problem) right through the roof. Because of that, I stopped taking it after only a few short days. Yes, I WANT to lose that weight, but not so badly that I'm willing to blow an artery in order to do so! Hopefully on my next visit, he can either adjust my BP meds OR give me a different weight-loss "helper" that *won't* put me at risk of stroking out...
In any case, I agree that, even with the distance between the three of us (you, me and Icey), we can certainly work on our mutual problem together. It's always nice to have the moral support, especially when, at the end of the day, it's hard to not feel "defeated" when I haven't managed to reach my goal(s) for the day. My Doc has a weight-loss "guru" in his office (an NP who manages his weight loss patients), and she's given me, I think, a good start at trying to get a handle on my problem. The first thing she's been having me do is to keep a food journal. THIS can be an issue, especially when I'm running my tired old ass off at work and munching on the go (hey, if one doesn't even have the time to sit down and eat a decent meal, HOW is one to find the time to write down everything one puts in one's mouth??), but I've been making myself DO it. Therefore, if I *don't* have the time to write down whatever it is I'm eating, I'll forego the pleasure until I DO. Of course, by the time that I actually HAVE the time, I'm usually so exhausted that all I want to do is crash...which might not be so bad. I could probably live off my stored fat for a number of WEEKS, as far as that goes! Another thing she's pushed at me is increasing my intake of water. Plain water is something that I've *never* much liked, but I'm MAKING myself drink at least two liters of plain water per day. I've done away with the "diet" soda (as much as I love the taste of it, it obviously isn't helping me and, from the studies I've read, it might even be helping to defeat my goal, because of the way the body reacts to *anything* it perceives as "sweet," even if the sweetener is artificial!). My next goal is to do away with (or even to cut in half) the wine or cocktail(s) that I enjoy after a long night at work. Yes, it seriously helps as a "stress-buster," but when you think that alcohol contains LOTS of "empty" calories and no nutrition whatsoever and, when you have only a limited number of calories which you can consume if you want to drop those pounds, I *know* that this is an indulgence which I will have to learn to forego! NOW, if I could *only* get *permanently* off those damned steroid medications! Honestly? I never HAD a weight problem until I started taking those damn things. Not only do steroids help one to pack on the pounds, but they have all kinds of OTHER nasty side-effects, i.e. emotional lability, delayed wound healing, thinning of the hair, skin, and nails, etc., etc., etc. Unfortunately, when the lupus is flaring big-time, they appear to be the *only* thing which helps to get it even halfway under control and I probably wouldn't have lived with this condition as long as I have if it weren't for the benefit of the things. Grrrrr!
Finally, Dennis, I certainly appreciated your "man's perspective" on the issue. Your wife is fortunate, indeed, to have a partner so loving and devoted to her. And no, I don't think that my husband is trying to "re-create" me, but rather, to encourage me to do things which make me feel good about myself. His whole idea is, "if you look good, you'll feel good, too, no matter how much you weigh" but he obviously doesn't have the self-esteem issues I've been struggling with throughout my entire life...which aren't *his* issue to fix! That, somehow, has got to come from me, and I'm working on it. While I've never been a "beauty," I was, in my day, an attractive woman (hell, on my *good* days, my skin is STILL good enough that I can pass for someone in her early 40's, even though I've now reached my mid-50's, which is no credit to me, of course...it's only because the photosensitivity caused by the lupus has forced me to protect my skin from sun exposure!), but my current difficulty with mobility, along with the extra weight I've put on over the past few years, has recently really worn on my own self-image. I always used to be the "capable" one, in every way, whether in problem-solving, working like a freaking horse, etc., etc. I'm still on top of my game professionally, but it's becoming physically harder and harder than it ever used to be for me to do the work which I love so much, and which I've spent such a huge portion of my adult life doing. Being a nurse is NOT just what I do for a living, it's who I AM! And it's hard for me when, along with the body-image issues and advancing age I'm dealing with, that performing this job which I'm so passionate about has become so painful and difficult to do. On one hand, I'm looking forward to the next chapter in my career -- mentoring nursing students during their clinical rotations -- and, on the other, those words I've heard so often keep repeating in my brain: "those who can, do, and those who CAN'T, teach." The closer my start date at my new job becomes, the more I agonize over those words.
In any case, I agree that, even with the distance between the three of us (you, me and Icey), we can certainly work on our mutual problem together. It's always nice to have the moral support, especially when, at the end of the day, it's hard to not feel "defeated" when I haven't managed to reach my goal(s) for the day. My Doc has a weight-loss "guru" in his office (an NP who manages his weight loss patients), and she's given me, I think, a good start at trying to get a handle on my problem. The first thing she's been having me do is to keep a food journal. THIS can be an issue, especially when I'm running my tired old ass off at work and munching on the go (hey, if one doesn't even have the time to sit down and eat a decent meal, HOW is one to find the time to write down everything one puts in one's mouth??), but I've been making myself DO it. Therefore, if I *don't* have the time to write down whatever it is I'm eating, I'll forego the pleasure until I DO. Of course, by the time that I actually HAVE the time, I'm usually so exhausted that all I want to do is crash...which might not be so bad. I could probably live off my stored fat for a number of WEEKS, as far as that goes! Another thing she's pushed at me is increasing my intake of water. Plain water is something that I've *never* much liked, but I'm MAKING myself drink at least two liters of plain water per day. I've done away with the "diet" soda (as much as I love the taste of it, it obviously isn't helping me and, from the studies I've read, it might even be helping to defeat my goal, because of the way the body reacts to *anything* it perceives as "sweet," even if the sweetener is artificial!). My next goal is to do away with (or even to cut in half) the wine or cocktail(s) that I enjoy after a long night at work. Yes, it seriously helps as a "stress-buster," but when you think that alcohol contains LOTS of "empty" calories and no nutrition whatsoever and, when you have only a limited number of calories which you can consume if you want to drop those pounds, I *know* that this is an indulgence which I will have to learn to forego! NOW, if I could *only* get *permanently* off those damned steroid medications! Honestly? I never HAD a weight problem until I started taking those damn things. Not only do steroids help one to pack on the pounds, but they have all kinds of OTHER nasty side-effects, i.e. emotional lability, delayed wound healing, thinning of the hair, skin, and nails, etc., etc., etc. Unfortunately, when the lupus is flaring big-time, they appear to be the *only* thing which helps to get it even halfway under control and I probably wouldn't have lived with this condition as long as I have if it weren't for the benefit of the things. Grrrrr!
Finally, Dennis, I certainly appreciated your "man's perspective" on the issue. Your wife is fortunate, indeed, to have a partner so loving and devoted to her. And no, I don't think that my husband is trying to "re-create" me, but rather, to encourage me to do things which make me feel good about myself. His whole idea is, "if you look good, you'll feel good, too, no matter how much you weigh" but he obviously doesn't have the self-esteem issues I've been struggling with throughout my entire life...which aren't *his* issue to fix! That, somehow, has got to come from me, and I'm working on it. While I've never been a "beauty," I was, in my day, an attractive woman (hell, on my *good* days, my skin is STILL good enough that I can pass for someone in her early 40's, even though I've now reached my mid-50's, which is no credit to me, of course...it's only because the photosensitivity caused by the lupus has forced me to protect my skin from sun exposure!), but my current difficulty with mobility, along with the extra weight I've put on over the past few years, has recently really worn on my own self-image. I always used to be the "capable" one, in every way, whether in problem-solving, working like a freaking horse, etc., etc. I'm still on top of my game professionally, but it's becoming physically harder and harder than it ever used to be for me to do the work which I love so much, and which I've spent such a huge portion of my adult life doing. Being a nurse is NOT just what I do for a living, it's who I AM! And it's hard for me when, along with the body-image issues and advancing age I'm dealing with, that performing this job which I'm so passionate about has become so painful and difficult to do. On one hand, I'm looking forward to the next chapter in my career -- mentoring nursing students during their clinical rotations -- and, on the other, those words I've heard so often keep repeating in my brain: "those who can, do, and those who CAN'T, teach." The closer my start date at my new job becomes, the more I agonize over those words.
"The miracle is this: the more we share, the more we have." -- Leonard Nimoy (1931-2015)
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Icey
Re: Getting old, fat and dowdy...
Cindy, phentermine's banned over here, although it can still be bought from private clincs, which I think's ridiculous because like any amphetamine-based medication, it causes the heart to race, and that's probably one of the LEAST nasty side effects. The stuff's evil, so glad you're trying to do something on your own instead of relying on these pills. A friend of mine was on them, and once she came off them, she ballooned to an even bigger size than she originally was, which depressed her even more.
The steroids don't help, as you well know. I also know. I was on them for 7.5 months, and it took me over 2 years to shift the lousy 60lbs I gained! Truly - it was horrendous, so I can appreciate how you feel, but I've been through the whole spectrum of keeping diaries, trying this diet and that diet and increasing my exercise levels. Then they found that I carried Factor V Leiden, after months of cross-checking my increased liver enzymes. It affected the glucose levels and caused my hormones to be really messed up. I knew that I wasn't eating more than I should've done, so couldn't understand why the weight gain was happening. I've managed to lose the bulk of it, but I'm still not down to what I was, and probably shouldn't be. I think I WAS too thin on reflection, but we all think we look OK when we're slim, and perhaps other people were right about it, but in my own mind, I looked OK.
As I said to Vikki, can you take NSAIDS instead of the steroids which you're on? They're no good to Vikks, but might be to you? I was just trying to think of ways to help, because we've all been faced, or ARE facing this problem of gaining the pounds which we don't want. I think the girls need to stick together and try and offer some probable help, because I went to see countless doctors and specialists about my own problems, and they all got it wrong until they gene mapped me and realised that my inherited condition played a big part in what was happening. It's not always easy to sort out hormonal problems either - as I'm sure you know. We have medics in the family, and even they were baffled at first, so it's not always a straight-forward case of dieting or trying out the plethora of fads which we're subjected to.
I think that a lot of these issues ARE to do with how we see ourselves, and perceive how others see us. It doesn't help when, as in your case, you have the other health issues to contend with. Sometimes they're connected, sometimes not, but they're not pleasant, and I marvel at how well you appear to carry on with the job you were obviously born to do. It can't be easy at all when you have various aches and pains and feel totally washed out with the long hours you do. The teaching job could be of great benefit to you, and you know I wish you all the best with it. New challenges can be a bit daunting, but I'm sure you'll be great.
AND - lol - please don't think of yourself as an unattractive woman. You're fortunate to have nice skin, and you don't look ugly or horrible to me. Make the most of what you have, and hold your head high. You just need a confidence boost, and let's hope that a gradual weight loss makes you feel a lot better. x
The steroids don't help, as you well know. I also know. I was on them for 7.5 months, and it took me over 2 years to shift the lousy 60lbs I gained! Truly - it was horrendous, so I can appreciate how you feel, but I've been through the whole spectrum of keeping diaries, trying this diet and that diet and increasing my exercise levels. Then they found that I carried Factor V Leiden, after months of cross-checking my increased liver enzymes. It affected the glucose levels and caused my hormones to be really messed up. I knew that I wasn't eating more than I should've done, so couldn't understand why the weight gain was happening. I've managed to lose the bulk of it, but I'm still not down to what I was, and probably shouldn't be. I think I WAS too thin on reflection, but we all think we look OK when we're slim, and perhaps other people were right about it, but in my own mind, I looked OK.
As I said to Vikki, can you take NSAIDS instead of the steroids which you're on? They're no good to Vikks, but might be to you? I was just trying to think of ways to help, because we've all been faced, or ARE facing this problem of gaining the pounds which we don't want. I think the girls need to stick together and try and offer some probable help, because I went to see countless doctors and specialists about my own problems, and they all got it wrong until they gene mapped me and realised that my inherited condition played a big part in what was happening. It's not always easy to sort out hormonal problems either - as I'm sure you know. We have medics in the family, and even they were baffled at first, so it's not always a straight-forward case of dieting or trying out the plethora of fads which we're subjected to.
I think that a lot of these issues ARE to do with how we see ourselves, and perceive how others see us. It doesn't help when, as in your case, you have the other health issues to contend with. Sometimes they're connected, sometimes not, but they're not pleasant, and I marvel at how well you appear to carry on with the job you were obviously born to do. It can't be easy at all when you have various aches and pains and feel totally washed out with the long hours you do. The teaching job could be of great benefit to you, and you know I wish you all the best with it. New challenges can be a bit daunting, but I'm sure you'll be great.
AND - lol - please don't think of yourself as an unattractive woman. You're fortunate to have nice skin, and you don't look ugly or horrible to me. Make the most of what you have, and hold your head high. You just need a confidence boost, and let's hope that a gradual weight loss makes you feel a lot better. x
Re: Getting old, fat and dowdy...
Icey, NSAIDs are "wonder drugs," if I say so myself. I used to take Anaprox DS (850 mg. of naproxen sodium) three times a day until my Doc stopped giving me scripts for it because of my history of recurrent GI bleeds. Even so, even though he *won't* prescribe me the ONLY thing which helps me with my inflammatory pain (sorry, but opioids won't DO that -- they'll just mess with my brain to the point where I no longer care about the pain...and then, I'm useless for anything else, too!), it's fortunate for me that naproxen sodium is now available in non-prescription strength over the counter. On my *really* bad days, I'll take about 4 tabs of Aleve (at 220 mg. each), and "play" with the risk of GI bleeding. Hey, if it happens, I'm likely to get myself in for treatment before I bleed to death, right?? Still, as *much* as I love those NSAIDs, they have their issues, as well; i.e., the tendency for your body to retain fluid, the risk for kidney and liver damage, and because of the fluid retention, the elevation of blood pressure, which is an issue for me anyway, etc. etc. After all these long years in my profession, I'm more and more convinced that there's no such thing as a "magic" pill. I'll still never forget the words of my childhood physician (a devout Seventh-Day Adventist) when he told me, "Cindy, anything I can give to you is poison. The trick is, to give you enough 'poison' to make you well." Over the years, THAT is the way I have learned to view medication. It's ALL freaking poison! I've yet to read of ANY medication that DOESN'T have a litany of adverse effects. And, even though it's frowned upon in the general medical community, I continue to look into natural and herbal remedies rather than "traditional" medicine to "solve" my many health issues. Hey, even if I'm wrong in this point of view, we've ALL gotta die of something someday, don't we?? Anyway, thanks for the encouragement re: the new job. You have NO idea how close I've been, on many occasions, to calling them and telling them to get someone else. As aggravating as my current job can be (at times -- and there are OTHER times when it's complete paradise!), there's not ONE single staff member on my shift who has my amount of experience, both in surgical nursing *and* in critical care, and I often worry about things falling apart once I'm gone...which, along with Rose's situation, makes me happy that I've decided to stay on PRN for a number of months after I've "quit" the full-time position.
"The miracle is this: the more we share, the more we have." -- Leonard Nimoy (1931-2015)
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Icey
Re: Getting old, fat and dowdy...
Well, good morning all, and after 2 attempts to answer you Cindy, I had to give up. Both posts disappeared completely! : (
Let me just say that, in a nutshell, I agree with you totally about the side effects of drugs and even natural remedies, and it's true what your doctor said - everything that's prescribed's a poison, but we hope that some of these poisons help, even at the cost of them causing other problems.
I hope that you DO take your new job, but I understand that you have reservations. Just look at it this way - you're qualified to teach others what you know, and isn't it better to pass on your knowledge and expertise to up and coming nurses such as yourself? Sooner or later, you're going to retire from work, and they'll be needing good mentors and tutors to carry on doing what you've learnt, so I think that changing roles slightly could be very good for you - and others - and perhaps far less stressful and tiring than what you have to go through right now.
I think that, considering your health issues, you manage superbly, but there comes a time when you have to put yourself first. I understand that you don't want to leave any patients in the care of incompetent or uncaring colleagues, but this's the whole point. You now have the chance to pass on all that you know, and to correct things which aren't right. That in itself's a worthwhile job and'll hopefully lend to there being staff who'll learn from you and be better prepared for their roles.
Let me just say that, in a nutshell, I agree with you totally about the side effects of drugs and even natural remedies, and it's true what your doctor said - everything that's prescribed's a poison, but we hope that some of these poisons help, even at the cost of them causing other problems.
I hope that you DO take your new job, but I understand that you have reservations. Just look at it this way - you're qualified to teach others what you know, and isn't it better to pass on your knowledge and expertise to up and coming nurses such as yourself? Sooner or later, you're going to retire from work, and they'll be needing good mentors and tutors to carry on doing what you've learnt, so I think that changing roles slightly could be very good for you - and others - and perhaps far less stressful and tiring than what you have to go through right now.
I think that, considering your health issues, you manage superbly, but there comes a time when you have to put yourself first. I understand that you don't want to leave any patients in the care of incompetent or uncaring colleagues, but this's the whole point. You now have the chance to pass on all that you know, and to correct things which aren't right. That in itself's a worthwhile job and'll hopefully lend to there being staff who'll learn from you and be better prepared for their roles.